bellemorda

if you don't see me online for a few days doesn't mean I dropped off the face of the earth. we're getting the house accounts changed and that includes the isp. the phone line is going to be dropped and a new internet router connected to replace the account that was in my name.

I still have my cell, for anybody who needs to know. those who might need to call me, you have my number. I'm sure I'll be back soon.

its been a pensive and productive week or so. now after dealing with the emotions of things and ordering my thoughts, there's a lot of stuff needs saying. needs writing, to be specific.  this is going to take a while but I think getting it out benefits me most for several constructive reasons.

so, let's get this off to a rollicking start, shall we?

 

is what my precocious 9 year old twinkie 1 wrote on the top of the ruled notebook paper. she showed it to me with the preamble:

"you know? blizzard could use some new gear. YOU could use some new gear. its not class specific, so anybody can use it! in fact -- you can trade it with your friends if you are going into a fight and they need something and you have it.  here is the list [complete with her item descriptions, and pictures, hand-drawn by herself]!"

1. Flammer blade:  a 2-handed sword that makes your attack strong and stuns the mob but it damages you a lot.

2. Ice cape: if you hit someone with the cape on, you freeze them.

3. Glider springs: Makes you reach places you can't reach with normal shoes. they have a loooooong cooldown though, so be wise when you pick to use them.

4. Shield dust: When you are about to die and (you are not a priest), you spray some on yourself or on someone else to power them up and shield them while they're dying and it will give them 4 seconds to save themselves with a pot or heal.

5. Power exchange: If you and a different being drink this at the same time you will exchange powers for 30 minutes.

5 Taperica mount: A flying lizard mount that lets you kill and ride in the air at the same time. and its blue like a deep sky blue with turquoise wings.

7. Crown of Justice: protects you when you put it on by adding holy damage to your attacks and fights for you when you throw it. and you can socket it.


"we need to petition a gm to see if we can get this stuff integrated by the next patch!"

she was pleased to hear I would try my hardest to see that blizzard got the information.
 

I know we watch far too much invader zim when this kind of thing is the soundtrack to my afternoons:

http://www.imeem.com/dialogs/standaloneplaylist/?p=FUvDv6dD

I've been craving all sorts of various things the past couple days: candied star gooseberries with chili and salt, coffee candy, jackfruit chips, green papaya salad, popcorn and turkey. I don't quite understand the turkey thing. I usually only care for it once a year and then I'm good. I boiled down a full turkey breast I'd had in the freezer, intending to make stock and then for the past three days have eaten nothing but the stock with the turkey and stock vegetables still in it. I braised a whole head of napa cabbage with sweet onion in some of the stock and for gobsake have been eating that for breakfast every morning. its just heavenly drizzled with sesame oil. but then hell, what isn't? I guess its better than craving pork rinds and ice cream, huh?

dunno how long my crazy foodie itch has been going on. a couple days? a week? not sure but everybody's benefitting I suppose.

 

finally getting around to the camwhorage of my new specs.
 

wow.

ok.

you're ok. you're all right. wherever you are, you're alive.

this is the best sobering news I've had in weeks.

and now I'm a little numb. and I'm thinking. I don't want to open my mouth til I know how to say things. its still sinking in but in a good way. all that anxiety and crippling doubt is snuffed out, and at least I'm peaceful knowing you're all right.

what's going on -- really, its painful, its life-changing. but I promise, its a good thing.
 
thank you, darlin.

I'm going to be changing my LJ to friends-only. I get the feeling that I'll be writing a lot more personal stuff and a lot less about the things that made this LJ so much fun in the first place - gaming, reading, art, music, all the subjective stuff that was great to write about. not that I'll stop writing about that stuff. its that over the past nearly two years things have come to where they are, and I don't doubt they'll continue to be the things I feel compelled to write about so I won't lose my fucking mind. I also know that things are probably going to get worse before they get better.

and I'm keeping in mind that in whatever stroke of luck way you all LJ friended me, this may not have been what you signed up for. the similarities or fortune that found us together may have diminished so that really its not either enjoyable or interesting to read what I'm writing anymore. alternately, my posts may not be the kind of thing you want *other* friends on your flist seeing you subscribe to for various reasons. I have to take into consideration that currently, the majority of what I write about could be considered disturbing, uninteresting or irrelevant to some of you from many standpoints: moral, religious, emotional, what have you.

the point is, I don't think anybody should feel obligated to have my posts fill up your flist if you're either uncomfortable or uninterested in what I'm doing here. I've had a couple old LJ friends drop me from their flist, and that's perfectly fine. I understand why and its all right. I don't want to keep anybody a captive audience.

from the receiving end, I'm very glad to have all you various and fascinating people I do on my flist. its virtually transporting from the mundane burn that are my days to read of vegan fare, homemade goodness, photography, writing, art, your education, your loss or triumph, or the amusing/moving things that happen in your daily lives. I'm grateful indeed.

people think I'm trying to be all that when I tell them I had to make fresh mayonnaise today for the tuna salad. the real issue here isn't that I must have homemade from fresh ingredients because I have a discerning palate. I do have a discerning palate and I do enjoy homemade mayo, I'm just too damn lazy to go to the store for a single jar of mayonnaise.

ok about my previous entry "joe broke his what?"

 I was writing drunk with tired last night and I wondered if it made any sense even after I read it twice myself.

last night when I was told that my friend joe was a quarterfinalist for the 2009 Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award, my addled-brain response was, "joe broke his WHAT???"

you should not brain when you are teh tired. and you should not tired and drive either, nor operate heavy machinery under the influence of tired. tired may cause teh stupids, dry mouth, feelings of listlessness and fumbliness. tired is a direct result of working the brain and body too hard or too long, therefore physicians recommend at least 7 hours without working the brain or body, with the eyes closed.this has been a public service announcement of the belle broadcast system.

night before last the stray cat decided that the back porch was not safe enough for her kittens. late at night I heard her hissing and wauling, and went to the back door to find a ghoul-faced possum nose-deep in her bowl of food, face towards the open end of the covered litter box we'd converted to a makeshift nursery.